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Thomas Butler Gunn Diaries: Volume 6, page 51, August 8, 1853

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Identifier: DX04077074

Title: Thomas Butler Gunn Diaries: Volume 6, page 51, August 8, 1853

Description: Regarding his feelings for Lotty Kidder Whytal.


into the dank streets, a fire in my heart and veins, and unspeakable thoughts in my brain.

It’s well I go tomorrow. I must master this business. Hot Passion will say Go on, thought it lead to Hell and nether confusion, — go on, for never since in Crana’s Isle Paris clasped Helen, was there form and face thou wouldst rather hold in love extacy [ecstasy] to thy heart than this girls [Charlotte Kidder Whytal’s]. / But oh the devils that assuredly will follow. Be noble and manly and do no wrong here. If shame and sin come, let it not be by thy opening the door. Supposing thou I coudst have this, — and in faith I know not, yea, or nay, — supposing thine such passion as she has to offer were possessed by thee — (be still accursed pulses at the thought!) wouldst thou wish her to be thy companion through the serious bridging betwixt two eternities, Life. Is she fitting for’t? Couldst thou make her so? No, and thousand times, No! And if so, is she to drift away to fresh sorrow and wrong, having met another Scoundrel to blacken her already obscured path. Very easy were it to play Sophist here. To say, What is she, what comes she of, — think of the mother, the Father &c do your best to have a pretty girl [word crossed out] love you. But Bah! If I did wrong, I wouldn’t try to call it Right, but walk to hand-shaking with the devil knowing him to be one.

Oh Lotty! perverse, foolish [unclear word], strangely frank, not altogether bad, human creature, I would I could help thee! That those beautiful brown eyes could look calm and peaceful. And that the kissings of thy sweet lips did not remain on mine

Rights: NoC-US


Dates: 1853-08-08

Type(s): Diary

Maker/Creator: Gunn, Thomas Butler, 1826-1903

Subjects: Diaries


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